20s Diary

Hey, it’s blog post Friday again. Today, I thought I would write about routines. In my 22 years of life, I had multiple instances where I realised that routines are essential if you want to make something out of yourself. Or maybe I should say routines and goals. Goals I talked about in my post, The myth of January, I never really had much problem with setting out goals for myself. It’s like second nature to me to daydream about what can be possible in my life. But routines now, routines are a different story.

I think I mentioned previously that I, like many students, am big on procrastination. I do it constantly. I do realise it’s a bad habit, but I just don’t know, I always feel like I have more time. Now, procrastination also makes me super stressed like all the time, so I for sure know it’s not good for me, but I do it anyway. Don’t get me wrong, what I need to do always gets done, but in a shorter amount of time than I would have liked. For example, I wrote my thesis in a month, which I first planned to write in three.

Now that I’m in this limbo, this grey zone between my BA and MA, I find containing routines hard. I did stick to some, don’t get me wrong, like I have an established workout routine now. But I just constantly make excuses to myself as to why I still have time to write my motivational letters to the universities, and the list goes on, of the things I’m currently procrastinating.

I feel as tho this time is similar to what I experienced during COVID, when we were all kind of locked in. Only now, even tho I have goals, they seem much less reachable, and I know if I just set a routine in place, I would feel closer to the goals, but at the same time, I’m just tired of always chasing sothing I thought this semester would be my chill time, but I just feel kind of embarrassed. I don’t have a job, and I’m not studying. I feel like I’m running, but I’m just so far behind that I just cannot reach the others. Which I know this isn’t true, it’s just a temporary situation, but I hate having no pourpuse and currently I feel like I have none.

So, I decided from next week I’m gonna have a routine. Wake up early and work on my applications. Maybe apply for some jobs. Netflix and YouTube I can spend max 1-2 hours a day, and that goes for TikTok as well. I’ll report on the progress next week.